LEDESMABABY

I know I’m not the only one that struggles with setting boundaries, especially when it comes to close friends and family.

Often times, you don’t even know when you should set boundaries. Lucky for you, I’m going to tell you some signs of when you should set boundaries and how!

Here are a few signs that it’s time to set some boundaries:

• When one expects you to prioritize them, but doesn’t prioritize you.
• When one can’t and won’t apologize sincerely.
• When one acts like the victim when confronted about their behavior.

How can you set boundaries, respectfully? Here’s how:

• Know what you want and be clear about it.
• Be direct and don’t apologize for your needs.
• Expect resistance and possible anger, but don’t let it deter you.
• Do not compromise your boundaries for them.

I saw a quote one day and it really stuck with me because when setting boundaries I never wanted to make someone mad or upset with me, but this quote is so true.

“If someone gets angry at you for setting a boundary, consider that a good sign that the boundary was necessary.”

I’ve had someone who deleted me on social media, just because I said no to going somewhere, and although I was upset and a little confused, it made me realize that person was never really a true friend and I made the right decision to set a boundary with them.

Setting boundaries may be difficult, especially if you haven’t done so before. Take your time to ask yourself the following questions and once you’ve answered them clearly, set those boundaries.

• Do I know what I want?
• Do I know my limits?
• Do I understand my own needs?
• Do I feel confident enough to say no?
• Do I respect myself?
• Do I uphold my own boundaries?
• Do I see the value in myself?
• Do I communicate my boundaries effectively?
• Do I respect other peoples boundaries?

And always, always remember when setting these boundaries:

• It’s ok to say no
• It is not your job to fix other people
• It is not your job to make other people happy
• It’s ok for others to disagree with you

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